Those who watch Uzalo on SABC 1 have been angered by Nosipho, who keeps returning to the arms of an abusive man. This man has been using her as his punching bag, but whenever he comes back to her, Nosipho welcomes him with warm arms and only for him to beat her up again for minor reasons.
Yesterday I saw women revealing the facts that make them hold on to an abusive relationship even though it keeps hurting them to stay. I went through the Twitter thread and summarised some of the facts they have stated.
Men manipulate women to depend on them.
There is a woman who stated that the first thing an emotional abusive men do is to separate you from family and friends so that you can depend on him. He will use money as an apology whenever you are angry at him. If you happen to have children with him, it becomes hard for you to leave.
A woman named Nothando thinks some women are forced to stay in abusive relationships because they are stranded and have nowhere else to go. She thinks it is people without financial freedom who find themselves being taken advantage of by the abuser because there is no other place for them to run to.
Some women do not understand love.
A lady known as Karabo believes that there are women who still do not understand love. She says such women have a tendency to tolerate everything in a relationship because they want to belong. She blames parents for teaching children to tolerate their toxic behaviours in the name of love, as they tend to carry that mentality into their adulthood.
hopes that he will change.
Someone thinks that some women choose to stay because they have seen the good sides of their men, so they keep hoping that he is still going to change and go back to his original self.
I believe that other than love, some women choose to stay because they are scared to move on. This is motivated by the saying, ‘better the devil that I know.’ Remember how convinced women are that all men are the same? This makes them believe that they might move on to another ‘devil’ whereas they are already attached to the current one.